Pregnant Again?

I'm POSITIVE I'm pregnant again... I think it happened exactly 2 weeks ago today. I don't have any symptoms except that I've been feeling crampy for about 5 days and it's like I have a bubble sitting where my uterus is. I certainly feel it when I'm sitting or bending over.

I walked to Walmart with Shaun yesterday and bought 2 tests. Of course, it came out negative; I knew it would, it's too early. I'll take another one on Saturday.

And another reason why I think I'm pregnant, when we had sex 2 weeks ago I was ovulating (I know by the way I was feeling). My cycle, I'm guessing, is around35 days (that's what it was before Shaun) and it would have been day 17 that Tuesday. This Saturday will be day 35.

But it's almost not even worth testing because I KNOW I am!

No No No

Nothing new this week but I forgot to write about his "no-no-no" last week. I was doing the dishes one day and peeked around the corner at Shaun who was playing on the carpet. He looked up, smiled and shook his head back and forth at me. It was so adorable. Now Craig and I will do that and say "no-no-no" at the same time and Shaun will copy us... with a giant grin of course!

I went to the Maple Syrup Festival this morning with Julia and Laura. It was so busy! And when I came home I was able to nurse Shaun and then pump and additional 3 ounces. I just used that milk in his cereal at 3:00.

Erika got married today and we had dinner with everyone at Oriental Taste. Dinner was great and Shaun was so good until the very end... it was hours past his nap time.

Just a quiet week this week; I weigh in on Wednesday but that's it. We'll see how that goes!

Our Day Adjusts

What a tough week this has been with Shaun. Near the end of last week I was struggling to get him to nurse at each feeding; he was really distracted and just didn't seem hungry. And he was refusing to go down for his third nap too. But I was finding that he couldn't last all the way to bedtime and I was putting him to bed at 7:00 or shortly after. So on Tuesday this week Craig and I started Shaun on a 4 hour schedule.
But here's the problem: Shaun still wasn't hungry when mealtime came and he still wanted to go to bed before 8:00. He was so miserable all day Tuesday and Wednesday. Wednesday morning we were at Donna's house and Thursday morning we went to Lisa's and stayed for lunch. I am amazed at how much Shaun relies on his schedule to function. It's like he loves how predictable his day is when he's on a routine and gets miserable and cranky when he doesn't know what's coming next. I don't know how people do it demand feeding. Even Melissa, because Bailey just catnaps all day. She must go bananas!!
So anyway, Craig and I talked and decided to do a bunch of things:

1. Start feeding Shaun less solids at each meal so he'll take more breastmilk.
2. Make the solids he does get have more fibre in them (we think he's a little constipated).
3. Go back to 3 1/2 hours but reduce his naps to 1 1/2 hours so that he'll still go down for a third nap.

Well, it's been 3 days (Friday, Saturday and today) and Shaun's back to normal. He's been getting less solids and is taking more breastmilk and is even having a third nap again. It took some experimenting but we finally found what works. His bedtime is 8:30.

Shaun's doing some really cute things now too! When he's sleeping at night he won't stay lengthwise in the crip; he always turns so his head is jammed between the siderails. He won't be able to do that much longer though because he's getting too long to fit! When we check on him before going to bed his legs are all cramped up. But it must be cozy because he does it every night. Another thing he's done a couple times now is give kisses. It's not all the time but if Shaun's in the right mood when you go in with a pucker he'll hold his mouth open and lean forward to kiss you. You'll end up getting your pucker right inside his mouth, and getting spitty too but it's so cute and Shaun loves it!

There's one more thing that Shaun's started doing in the past 3 or 4 days. I call it his "lizard tongue". Out of the blue he'll poke his tongue out of his mouth and make it all skinny and pointy. The funniest thing about it is that he holds it there! Sometimes for a whole minute, just looking around. He must know it's cute! And when we're holding his hands to help him walk, he sticks his tongue out and breathes big, spitty breaths. It sounds so funny and looks hilarious. Craig and I just laugh. What a clown!

Oh! And I almost forgot! Shaun says "ma-ma" now. He said it for the first time on Wednesday while I was changing him and now he says it all the time. It's funny: when Shaun would be upset before and cry "da-da" I didn't have a problem saying no. But now, it's so much harder to let him cry if he's saying "ma-ma". Especially if he's looking at me! He's definitely learning how to get what he wants.

Shaun loves to walk too, assisted of course! He holds onto our index fingers and just motors. On Thursday and Friday he walked all the way to the mailboxes and back - I couldn't believe it! He gets so excited and then there's that lizard tongue... I'm laughing just thinking about it!

Kitty and Pokey are getting much better with Shaun now. Kitty actually comes into his room in the morning and before bed and sits on the footstool while I'm nursing him. She'll flip her tail around and he plays with it. And Pokey teases Shaun so much! Especially when he's playing on the floor. She sits just out of his reach and taunts him by stretching and rolling or flicking her tail. What a bunch we have here!

Like Clockwork

Yesterday Shaun and I went to a free Erick Traplin concert at Country Hills Library. We picked up Stesha and Dylan and met Lisa, Sheri and the 4 kids there. I really enjoyed the show and I think Shaun did too... he was smiling and jumping on my lap for most of the show. But by the time we got home Shaun was exhausted because he'd missed his nap. So rather than eat, like he would on a normal day, I put him down around 11:45 and he slept until 2:00 and then napped again from about 4:00 until 6:00. So he only got 4 feedings yesterday... but it was fine!
And this morning the 3 of us met Lisa at Miltons for breakfast then Lisa and I went to Scholars Choice. I got a ton of craft stuff for Shaun and some wooden letters for his bedroom door.
Shaun's tried every vegetable I've made and his very favourite is roasted beets! I couldn't believe how excited he was eating them for the first time. And I bought a mango at the grocery store and he loved that too. The only thing he's not really into is green beans. He'll eat them but you can tell they're not his favourite.
He follows his scshedule like clockwork, even if we're out... it's amazing.
Shaun's started eating finger foods like puffed rice, toast crusts, and unsalted crackers. He's so cute to watch because he hasn't completely figured out how to get the food out of his fist and into his mouth without dropping it. And his pincer grasp hasn't developed yet either. So the only sure-fire way for him to get rice crisps for example into his mouth is if they stick to his wet fingers and then he sucks his fingers. But this morning I offered him some wheat puffs and he was really successful. I think it was easier to pick them up because they're bigger... more to hold in his clumsy hand.
He's so perfect. I look at him while he's sleeping and he'll be moving his little mouth, sucking away. And then when he's awake his big eyes just draw me in. It's so hard for me to get stuff done when he's awake because all I want to do is spend time with him! Being a mum is so fabulous!!!
Oh, and one more thing: a few days ago Shaun said "ba-ba-ba" while I was doing his diaper change. Thinking about what he has to do with his mouth to make that sound (compared to "da-da") I'm betting that "ma-ma-ma" isn't too far away. Within a month hopefully!!

She's Baaaaack

Well I got my first period last night. Actually it was yesterday afternoon while we were at Grandma's. When it started it was only a bit of brown but today it was heavy and red, just like before Shaun. I had been feeling sort of crampy for the last week or so but I never thought twice about it. But I understood the reason behind the cramps once my period came.
And I was feeling so pucky this morning. After putting Shaun down at 9:45AM I crawled back into bed and slept until 11:40. Then I fell asleep again from 1 to about 1:45 when Wayne and LEah arrived. They just stopped by for a short visit and Leah had Shaun laughing pretty hard.
Craig, Shaun and I went to Miltons for dinner. Shaun was so good. I don't know why I'm so surprised anymore when he's really good; because he's good all the time!

6 Month Update

So I figured I should write Shaun's 6 month update before I forget. I'm sure I'll forget some anyway.
Shaun's tried all four starter cereals: rice, wheat, barley and oatmeal. He seems to like the barley and oatmeal the best. We would give him one cereal for about 4 days before introducing the next. He's drinking water out of a sippy cup too. And on Tuesday we gave him vegetables for the first time. I say vegetables because he tried spinach and it wasn't pureed enough so then we tried peas only to run into the same problem. So on Wednesday we gave him green beans that I had pureed very smooth. I don't think he liked them. He'd close his eyes and purse his lips and then shudder. So funny! We learned we had to give him the beans before the cereal or he wouldn't eat them. Sometimes I'd trick him and give him a spoon of cereal in between. He'd be so surprised when he'd get beans in the next spoonful.
As far as his physical milestones: he's able to sit forever and not topple over; twisting, turning and reaching for toys. Sometimes he'll wobble but he's able to steady himself before toppling over. Rolling over is still inconsistent. I found him stuck on his tummy in the crib yesterday but he was hysterical this morning while laying on his back but never rolled over. It's like he forgets he can do it.
Shaun's able to hold a toy for long periods of time before dropping it. And he will transfer it from one hand to the next. If things are the size of his hand or bigger he's able to pick them up but I gave him puffed rice this morning and he wasn't able to palm any and pick them up. They got into his mouth from me or because they stuck to his wet fingers. The texture took a while for him to get used to. And if the rice didn't go in far enough, Shaun would just spit it out.
He's still on a 3 1/2 hour feeding schedule, eating first at 8AM. He gets cereal and veg at his 11:30 and 3PM feedings. But I think this weekend we'll work on moving him into a 4 hour schedule with breakfast, lunch, dinner and a bedtime snack. I'm not sure...
The reason I'm hesitating with the 4 hour routine is because I'm not sure I'm ready to drop another feeding. I know Shaun's able to go 4 hours but I enjoy nursing him so much that I don't want to do it less than 5 times a day. And... if he gets cereal and veg at 6:30 then he's definitely NOT going to be hungry for his last meal at 8:30PM. It's a tough call and I'm feeling pretty stumped.
Okay, so upon further contemplation, I've made my decision: I will stay at 3 1/2 hours but offer cereal at 8:00AM, 11:30 and 3:00PM. Shaun will only get breastmilk at 6:30 and 8:00. Hopefully this schedule will make it easier to drop the 6:30 nursing and move straight into a 4 hour day.
Hmmm, let me think of some other things Shaun's learned to do... he's a pretty good swimmer now! He'll kick and splash in the pool, it's so adorable. Well, I know there's so much more but I can't think of any of it right now. I'll have to add to this entry as I think of stuff!

Dizzzzzy Spells

Out little monster got his second tooth today. It's the neighbour to the tooth he got about 2 weeks ago. Craig's been calling Shaun's first tooth "Little Chomper" or "Lil' C" for short. Today Craig named Shaun's second tooth "C Junior". What a goof!
Sheri babysat Shaun this afternoon for about an hour so I could go see Dr. Oh about my dizzy spells. He's a laryngologist and also a head and neck surgeon. He did some similar tests to those of Dr. McKinnon and a few new ones. But the result was the same as every other test: normal. So far I've had: bloodwork (during pregnancy), echocardiogram (also during pregnancy), a hearing test (that was done yesterday) and now Dr. Oh's sending me for an ENG. That will test my vestibular nerve by making me dizzy and studying how my body reacts to the dizziness. The appointment will be at University Hospital in London so Mum can help me out with Shaun.

Cereal Man

So Shaun's learned a whole bunch of new tricks recently. He finally proved to us that he really can roll over from tummy to back; we haven't been dreaming it for the past 5 monthsl and back to tummy. He's been doing both all week. But Shaun seems to really enjoy his tummy time so he's not too motivated to roll all that much.
He sat on his own for the first time this week and is able to do it for about 5 minutes before slowly toppling over. He will slowly lean further and further forward until he's kissing the floor and then he'll call us to help him. But it's pretty cute.
And Shaun is getting more expressive every day. He's making so many noises and sounds we can't keep track anymore.
The biggest change of all: he's eating cereal now. He's had rice and wheat so far. He'll try oat tomorrow but likes rice the best so far. I'm just thawing some of my breastmilk to use with it and he seems to prefer that to the formula included or formula added varieties. I think he's ready to extend his schedule to 4 hours, too. Because when his first nap arrives at 9:30 he's not tired yet. Soon - at the end of the month I'll switch - I scheduled his 6 months photos counting on him being on a 3 1/2 hour schedule.

5 Months Old

Our little man is growing up. He's 5 months old. I have the itch for another baby - bad. I'd love to start trying now but then I'd be pregnant through the summer again. Yuck. Our plan is to start trying in the early summer, that way it will be a spring baby - April or May... assuming it will take is 3 months to get pregnant. People were right when they said once you start having kids you can't stop until you're done. Oh, I hope Craig decides he wants 3!
This week Shaun has learned to sit up (but not completely unassisted yet) and to almost roll over from back to tummy. He's a pro at rolling onto his side and just needs to shift his shoulder a bit to make it all the way... soon! He's also started to babble. He goes on and on with da-da-da-da. I'm trying to teach him ma-ma but he's not biting. He'll try and all that will come out is oooo or da-da. What a stinker!
So we ended up going to my parents about 2 weeks ago and leaving Shaun there. It was such a nice break but man-o-man we missed him so much! We'll be going back next weekend to celebrate a joint anniversary with Tara/Wes and Steve/Tamrah. All I know it that Mum is making guacamole. I've never had it but I'm looking forward to trying it.
Well it's 11:30, time for Shaun to eat.

Two New Cousins!!

Shaun is such a fabulous baby! I took him to Miltons this morning for breakfast with Lisa and even though it was his nap time he didn't make a peep! He was happy and well bahaved the whole time. By the time he actually got to bed it was 11:10 and even then he sang for 5 minutes before settling into nap-land. We truly are so lucky.
Joseph Tyler Higginson, 7 lbs. 3 oz, born Monday, January 16 @ 8:28PM. I got to be at Lisa's bedside for some of her labor too! That was exciting.
And Andre Adams, 7 lbs. 15 oz, born Wednesday, January 18 @ 4:04PM. So much for Esther having a small baby... maybe since she's so tall the baby had more up and down space than most so got to grow normal size after all.
Shaun got a yeast infection last weekend. While changing his diaper Craig noticed a small rash around his penis. It was 4 or 5 small and red, raised bumps. And even after using Zincofax for 4 days it wasn't getting better. So on Wednesday I finally called the doctor and he suggested just using Canesten cream on it (that's what women usually use for yeast infections). It was much better by the next diaper change and completely gone by yesterday. Phew!

A Moment of Reflection

You know? Sometimes I'm amazed that it's been a whole year since we first found out we were pregnant with Shaun... a year is such a long time but it feels like so much less. And then I remember back to how I was feeling a year ago: thinking about where I'd be now and it felt like "a whole year, that's so far away".
I get really sad thinking about it. In a year Shaun's going to be walking and his own little independent self and I'll probably be pregnant again; moving on from this point in my life. I'm so happy with where we are right now, I just want to stay right here. I don't want Shaun to grow up, I don't want us to grow old, I don't want to have to flip over another page on the calendar, I don't want to stop nursing Shaun... so much is perfect now and the future is so unpredictable.
I think I just need a really good cry. I haven't had one of those since Shaun was just a few weeks old. I need to accept that things are going to change, grieve it and let it go.
Melissa from across the hall has been listening to Shaun on the monitor the last couple of nights while I've been leaving to pick up Craig. She says that she'll be needing me a lot this month too so she's glad to help me out. It's just so handy. And she's great. We get along very well.
Tomorrow is Shaun's first swimming lesson. Me and him will be going every Friday evening for 9 weeks to Waterloo Rec Centre for an 'introduction to water' or sorts. But Craig has the day off tomorrow (a lieu day) and is coming with Shaun and I. His first time in the pool, I hope he enjoys it! We'll see.
Craig and I finally decided what to do for our anniversary celebration. At the Talbot Theatre in London a comedy/opera called Ruddigore is playing. We're going next Saturday night. Our plan (it's still just a plan because we haven't confirmed with my parents yet) is to go to my parents' Saturday afternoon and have dinner with them and leave Shaun with them for the night. They can take him to the meeting on Sunday and then come here for dinner Sunday night. If they're here for Shaun's 3PM feeding then he'll only miss 3 feedings. That should be okay... I should be able to pump for those. I'm going to call them in the morning and see.

A Van

Shaun moved to his big boy carseat today. We installed it this morning. It was harder than we thought...
Shaun's started some really sute things recently. When he's nursing he doesn't like to wait for the let-down (it takes too long) so he'll suck for 10 or 15 seconds and then pull off and take a break and suck his thumb. He'll do it sometimes for 5 minutes until the let-down comes. It's so cute. My mum thinks it's completely hilarious.
Something else he has learned is how to pucker. Friday last week (Dec. 30) Craig was puckering at Shaun and blowing (like a mini raspberry) and Shaun was watching him so carefully. Sure enough, the next day Shaun was puckering his lips. He'll suck on them too, one corner at a time and it's just adorable.
Another thing is the real raspberry. While he was puckering a few days ago, I did the same as him but relaxed my lips and, as expected, he was doing it the next day. But when Shaun does it he can't control his spit and it ends up all over the place. But it's amazing that he can copy what we do. How does he know that his mouth is there and is the same as the mouth we have? It's simply amazing!
So... I think I have Craig convinced that we need a minivan. Just putting the carseat in helped him realize we have to get one. The car seat fits so tight in the car it isn't even as reclined as it should be but there's simply no more room. Craig's been on the internet for about an hour looking at Pontiac Montanas. To sell the car would get us from $9000 to $11000 and a Montana (2003 and less than 75000 km) goes for around $15000. Not bad. It's just an idea at this point but if we're going to trade in the car we have to do it soon before it has too many kms. Now it's 119000. And then we have to decide how to pay for it: have a car payment or use the equity in the house. I think we should put it on the house. It will only add a year or so to the whole mortgage. Is it worth it thought? If we wait too long will we be able to afford it? Sheesh!

Rescheduling

So after writing out 3 pages of schedules, we finally found something that works for everyone. Shaun's moved to a 3 1/2 hour routine which is going really well and everyone has adjusted beautifully. For the past 2 days he and I have gone for a walk around 4:30 since he has a snowsuit now. We got it at Gap for $35. It is down-filled and was originally $98. Good deal huh?

Tomorrow night is New Years Eve and we're heading over to Chris and Lisa's. Lisa's making a pork roast for dinner and I'm bringing a bunch of hors d'oeuvres for later. I have coconut shrimp with apricot-ginger dipping sauce, smoked salmon in tortilla cups and mango-brie quesadillas. It's going to be quite a feast!
And Sunday Mum and Dad are stopping here on the way back from Toronto. We'll just order pizza for dinner from Pizza Pizza. It should be a great weekend!
Oh, and I almost forgot... I think there's a chance I could be pregnant! I remember last year feeling car sick and then I found out we were having Shaun. Well, it's been the same feeling for the last few mornings. I was gagging in the car on the way to Zehrs this morning I felt so yucky. If it continues I'm taking a test on Monday; I bought 2 today. I know the timing kind of sucks (another summer pregnancy and Shaun only a year old) but I'm secretly hoping I am. I loved it with Shaun!

Oh, he's awake. Baby calls!

Is Pooping In The Tub A Milestone?

One more week and Shaun will be 4 months old. Everything has been happening so fast! I can't believe the year is almost over!

So a couple nights ago, Tuesday, I'm putting Shaun in the tub and he pees. Okay, that's normal. But then he's stil grunting and sure enough, a soft yellow turd floats to the top of the water. I'm laughing as I'm getting Shaun out of the water to put a diaper on him so I can wash the tub. I had to call Lisa too so I could share my woes! As I'm on the phone with Lisa, Shaun pukes down the front of my shirt and it drips into my bra - YUCK YUCK! So I change my shirt, clean the tub, fill it back up, take Shaun's diaper off (sure enough it's empty) and put him back in the water. And wouldn't you know it, he pooped again, this time more! Even though he was in the water it squirted all up his back and because he was moving around the floaters got all smooshed between his fingers and in his armpits. It was so gross. I'm sure all the neighbours know he pooped in the tub because I was shrieking and laughing so loudly. By the time I had scrubbed the tub again and washed and dried Shaun, the whole ordeal had been almost an hour. I had to call Lisa again after the second time and I called Mum and told her too... what a milestone!

As far as Shaun's schedule goes, I had tried last weekend to move Shaun into a 3 1/2 hour routine instead of 3 hours and he wanted nothing to do with it. I'm sort of puzzled now as to how I'm going to drop the 6th feeding and 4th nap. I think it will take some experimenting. Currently, this is what his schedule is:

Feedings/Naps

8:00 AM / 9:15 - 11:00
11:00 AM/ 12:30 - 2:00
2:00 PM / 3:30 - 5:00
5:00 PM / 6:30 - 8:00
8:00 PM / night time sleep from 9:30 PM to 8:00 AM
9:30 PM

Now the timing of the last feeding varies by about 45 minutes, depending on if I have the car or not. No car, the feeding is at 9:30, car, the feeding is at 10:15.
Eventually Shaun's last feeding will be at 8:00 and then he'll go down for the night. My thoughts are that for the next 6 days I gradually work back the last feeding to 8:00PM. Can Shaun do it in only 6 days?

Obviously there's the potential that the transition won't go so smoothly but we'll see. Shaun's pretty adaptable and he may surprise us! It's worth a try anyway.

Little Traveller

Shaun certainly has quite the personality! The little monster has learned that he can delay bedtime by singing to me while I'm rocking him. It makes me laugh because he's so cute and as a result it takes me forever to finish the bedtime routine. He's so silly!
He's one of the most easy going babies I know, too. I can be out all day, from the time I drop Craig off to the time I pick him up and Shaun eats and sleeps right along with his schedule. In fact, last week Beth and I were in Toronto shopping all afternoon and Shuan was amazingly good. He makes being a new Mummy so easy!
Craig's really being a huge help now too. It was tough for a while I think because we were still getting used to Shaun and even each other being parents. He's started taking initiative when it comes to getting Shaun up or putting him to bed. Craig even gave Shaun a bath a few nights ago while I was baking some cookies.
It looks like we're going to be here longer than we had originally planned. We pay so little for the mortgage that I think we'd really struggle if we were to move right now; it'd be a huge adjustment. We'll definitely have our second child here. Our goal is to move before Shaun starts school, but hopefully sooner.
Next weekend plans are in the works to go to Mum and Dads for dinner on Saturday. Tara and Wes will be there and Steve and Tamrah have been invited as well. Donna's having us and Chris and Lisa over on the Sunday. This months is getting busy already!

A Full Night's Sleep!

So right after my last entry Shaun started sleeping through the night. I had talked to Sheri that day and told her about him waking at 5AM. Sheri told me that Shaun was able to sleep longer than 5AM and she encouraged me to let him cry. So 5AM came and he woke, fussed 5 minutes (really!) and went back to sleep. I couldn't believe it. The next week-and-a-half he slept all the way through almost every night. Only a couple of nights he would wake and cry... one night he cried for almost an hour! But now he's not waking at all so this weekend we're going to my parents house and they're going to babysit. His first babysitters! We'll go out for dinner in London and then probably to Yuk-Yuk's or a Jazz bar of some sort. Mum and Dad will give Shaun his 8PM feeding and then take him to the meeting in the morning. He'll have is 11AM feeding whle at the meeting. It'll be interesting to hear what everyone thinks of him! He waking up... duty calls!

Thumbsucker

I'm not sure how mum had time for us 3 kids. Between feeding and waketime I feel like the time in between is so minimal. I need time to relax but it's hard to keep up with the housework too and cook all the meals. And just when I start to really get into a project, it's time for Shaun to wake up again and then the cycle starts all over again. But I love being a mum. Watching Shaun grow and change and learn new things every day is incredible. What a miracle children are!

Shaun found his thumb for the first time last night. He was stirring in his crib so Craig went to check on him and his whole thumb was in his mouth and he was sucking away. I saw it today and it's so cute! His little fingers curled around his nose...
I have cleaning to do and I'll have to go through his clothes soon and pack away what's too small.

Back on the Saddle

We are so lucky! Shaun is such a good baby! The only glich was on Wednesday; he was waking up only 45 minutes into his nap all day and I finally realized it was because he was hungry. Must be going through a growth spurt. We were shopping in Conestoga Mall today and Shaun slept the whole time. He seems to adjust to whatever we're doing.

Craig and I were talking tonight about dropping the 11PM feeding and moving it to earlier but after I read in Babywise that most babies are 3 to 5 months old when that happens, we decided to hold off a while. Shaun is just so hard to wake up for that feeding!

I was writing some new schedules out tonight that we may use once Shaun moves into a flexible 3-4 hour routine. I think it's going to take a lot of experimenting and adjusting to see what works best for us. It's a bit harder for us because Craig's shift is so different than the norm. We don't actually get going until 9:30 at the earliest. I'll have to see what works the best.

Tomorrow we're going to Wayne and Leah's for the afternoon. Chris came back from Colorado last night. It will be nice to see him again.

And our photos are scheduled at Zehrs for this Thursday. I haven't even begun to decide what we'll all wear. I hope Shaun smiles nice for his photos. We're getting 3 poses for $25. Good deal!

My nipples are completely back to normal. I haven't worn breast pads for about a week too and I'm not leaking either. I've even gone braless a couple of nights.
We had sex today for the second time since Shaun was born. It was 100X better than the first time which was last weekend. I guess I just needed a couple more days to heal. Mum told me that with all 3 of us she didn't get her period until she was DONE breastfeeding and we were completely weaned. That would be nice! Although it would be nice to get pregnant in the late spring and I'll still be breastfeeding then. We'll have to see. I'm a little afraid of how we'll do financially but look at other families who are making so much less than Craig and they survive on one income. I'm confident we could make it work, it would just take some adjustments, just like everything. Besides, how does the saying go... nothing worth it is easy to obtain. Something like that. Basically, being a stay at home mum won't be easy and financially it will be challenging but that's what is best for the kids and it will all be worth it in the end. We'll make it work!

The Adjustment is Complete... For Now

Life has stabilized. We're all on a pretty good schedule now. Shaun eats every 3 hours with his first feeding being at 8AM. After his last feeding at 11PM he usually sleeps until at least 5AM. Although last night he woke at 2:30AM hungry. I think it's because he didn't get enough from the bottle at 11PM. He's so cute to watch when he's eating though and he takes the bottle so good. I've been pumping quite a bit so Craig is going to start feeding Shaun his last meal. I think Shaun is getting ready to move into a 3 1/2 hour routine and I hope he starts extending his nighttime sleep soon. Even sleeping until 6AM would be nice... then I can -- actually, now that I'm thinking about it, I know what I need to do. Once Shaun is consistently sleeping until 6AM I can move his last feeding back to 10:00 or 10:30 so that he eats at 5AM still and then 8AM. I think, though, that his schedule is going to be a bit different from other people's because of our schedule. We don't actually get going until 9 or 10AM.
I went and saw Dr. Raby yesterday for my 6 week appointment (even though it's been 7 weeks). She did a Pap spear and also said my uterus is back to normal. We talked briefly about birth control and prenatal vitamins. As far as birth control goes, the pill can affect quantity of breastmilk so that's not an option. She suggested barrier methods: condon and foam. Although, as long as I'm exclusively breastfeeding the chance of me getting pregnant is next to nothing so I'm not sure we'll use anything. Dr. Raby also said that I have to continue taking my prenatal vitamins as long as I'm breastfeeding and add an extra mg of folic acid when we're planning on getting pregnant again. I asked her about weight loss too and she said I could proceed with that whenever I'm ready so I'm going to my first meeting tomorrow night. I'm so anxious to get back to my goal weight!

Much Ado About Nothing

So motherhood is amazing. I've had a few low points and I seem to take my stresses out on Craig at the end of the day but for the most part I'm completely enjoying baing a mum. I love picking him up and hearing him stop; I love how content he is after eating; I love that he smiles at me when I smile at him... it's just amazing!
I've come to realize though, that I'm way too hard on myself and especially hard on Craig. I'll harp on the smallest things that are totally worthless to even worry about. Like the other night, Craig went in to settle Shaun since he was fussing and left the night light on when he left the room - no big deal at all, right? Well I came downstairs with Shaun and immediately started complaining to Craig about the light. He just looked at me but didn't say anything. Thinking about it now, why did I say anything at all? Who cares? I've noticed that he'll check with me a lot before he does stuff relating to Shaun. I think it's because he's worried I'll freak out over whatever he does. On one hand I really appreciate that he checks with me because he realizes that I'm working hard to get Shaun on a schedule and stuff but on the other hand I feel like he feels like less of a parent - insuperior to me. I don't want it to be like that at all!
He's such a great dad. He talks so funny to Shaun and does diaper changes and ALWAYS kisses him before Shaun goes for a nap or Craig leaves for work. He's adjusted so well and goes to work and works hard all day and then comes home and helps as he can with Shaun. Yet I still get angry that he's watching TV and not helping me. But ask me what I want him to do and I probably won't know. It's strange. I think we just have to spend more time talking to each other and not like "how was your day". It's just hard to find the time. We'll be fine it's just going to take some time to adjust.